apa_grapa (apa_grapa) wrote in thequestionclub,

I "broke up" with my best friend of 17 years about 4 months ago. She was a serial cheater on her husband, tried to sabotage her BC to get pregnant, and was verbally and mentally abusive to her husband. She met a new guy while married, hubby found out, divorce is in progress and she moved right in with new guy claiming she was happy because she was finally having sex with the frequency SHE liked.
I told her I needed space from her, that I coudn't watch her self-destruction and know that she could do such things to people she loved (and that that person could potentially be me). Stress levels have been way down in my life, but I miss her every day. 17 years is a long time, and she's not a bad person, just doesn't know how to handle herself due to a lot of emotional and psychological trauma from her own life.She's never done anything to me, personally.
Cue to today. She contacted me. She's pregnant from the dude she's been dating for 5 months. Divorce not yet finalized. Wedding due in August. She wants me back in her life. We're basically sisters, have been through all sorts of shit. However, I can't decide whether I should turn down my best friend of 17 years again during a very big time in her life, or be selfish and continue to only take care of ME right now.  
I'm in recovery for an eating disorder. Very stress sensitive thing... but she's been through an eating disorder and suffers from depression. Possible help from my beloved friend? or relapse bomb waiting to happen? Worth all the shit to have my best friend back?

idk idk, I really need unvalidated opinions from strangers who don't know the whole story. Give me things to think about :(

EDIT:  Thank you, thank you, thank you. TQC speaks truth.  I feel waaaay more relieved, being able to talk it out a bit. Love you guys!
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