Rundown for the tl;dr people:
This Nick called my best friend Amanda, fat and ugly (Which she is NOT) in a public setting, I called him out. He said he would apologize and after several days when he still hadn't she requested he do so politely on his facebook wall. This was his response. The bold parts are for you guys.
Ps. Original grammar has been preserved. You think a degree from one of Canada's best universities would help... I guess not.
As i told Juulie, I am sorry that I said it and even more sorry that I hurt your feelings. I shouldn't have called you the ugly one, as, quite honestly, I don't find you or Jen that attracitve. No offense.
Yes, i picked you because your fat. But as someone who spent the majority of their life as the fat kid I know "we're" the ugly ones. Unfortunately...I've battled with my weight forever and I know how hard it is.
I should not have said it, but you can't possibly think that I meant to hurt your feelings. I was (I thought) joking around with Juulie about the night at the lagoon. I should point out that she said NOTHING to correct my statement, and in fact laughed at it. I don't know you, she does, maybe that should concern you.
I'm a comedian. When joking with other comedians I assume they won't tell their friend and family. I can't stress enough that, in no way, did I think you would ever have heard what I said. I don't tell my friends if other people think they're ugly, unless they really attracted to that person who said it or that person is close to them so they should know if their friend is talking behind their backs or not. I'm not your friend and I barely know you.
Finally, if I have a problem with something someone did to me I don't air it out for everyone to see. Juulie brought this up in front of a lot of people the other day and now you post something on my wall (which I did take down) rather than messaging me about this. Do you girls want revenge on me for hurting your feelings? And if so, why do I and my opinions matter so much?
I AM sorry to have hurt your feelings Amanda, again I have been on that end many times and I should know better. But I never set out to hurt or embarass you, which is what it feels like you and Juulie are doing.
I've washed my hands of Juulie, please wash your hands of me. Maybe Juulie too, because it seems to me she cares little about your actual feelings and more about stirring shit uop.
EDIT: The general consensus is we should advise this racist, sexist pig to die and just leave him alone. This shall be our course of action. Many thanks to the group.