Kanani (i_lovefallingup) wrote in thequestionclub,
Kanani
i_lovefallingup
thequestionclub

how do you get someone to stop being in love with you?

My husband and I were seperated for four months, and in that time period I met a guy that I had A LOT in common with, got along amazingly with, etc etc.

So this guy (lets call him "tiger", cuz that's what I call him) is in an "Open relationship" so he had ideas about us to begin with (to which i said i don't do rebounds or get involved with 'open relationships'). but they were for funsies, not emotional reasons.

Got back with my husband.

Tiger tells me he is in love with me. like a lot.

Obviously, I show him how I have a ring back on my finger, and very sternly say "I do NOT have those feelings for you". (also a heated conversation on how he's a douche bag for saying these things to someone's wife while also having a serious relationship of his own- its open to sex, not to falling in love with other people duh).

Now, I care a great deal about this guy. i'm socially awkward and live in a small town after living in a city my whole life, finding kids I like enough to persue a friendship with is hard. I very much love the relationship I have with Tiger, so I do not want to cut ties altogether (my husband knows about his feelings because I thought it was appropriate to tell him, it makes my marriage slightly stressed and it makes the friendship stressed because it creeps me out when he wants to talk about his feelings for me- which happens often).

So. How do you make someone lose interest? Without treating them like crap?

can this be achived in the first place?
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