iamscared11111 (iamscared11111) wrote in thequestionclub,
iamscared11111
iamscared11111
thequestionclub

I got called out on something yesterday. Should I change this about myself?

I'm scared because I never realized that it makes people uncomfortable when I do this. I always thought people appreciated it.

I always ask people questions about themselves. Like when they tell me something, I always ask why or how, and try to get down to their motivation because I like to learn about people.

My friend, whom I've met in the fall, told me that I make her uncomfortable when I do that because she feels that I "dig into people and try to see them, their personal feelings. Like a psychologist." She said, "I'm transparent, and I thought you were, too, at first, but you're not as simple as you look. You have a protection up, and that scares me. I don't know what your subtext is." (She can't speak English well, I think she meant that she can't read me.) She started to say this when I asked her how long she has known a mutual friend K. She said, "longer than you, but I feel more comfortable with you." I asked why. And she said that I seem softer than K. I asked how. And it was then that she called me out on that (what I said previously). She says that she doesn't trust me enough. I just like to know people's opinions.

Honestly, please give me your honest opinion of this, but please don't be too harsh. This commmunity has said some hurtful stuff, but please not this time because this has always been my personality so it'll hurt a lot more. I like honesty, but please don't be mean. Should I change this (with everyone else)? 
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