Once, I gently slid a dying fish from my aquarium into the toilet to flush so that it wouldn't suffer any longer or contaminate my other fish. Strangely enough, the cold water revived it somewhat. I felt a little sorry for the little bastard and let it swim around for a bit. Then I went about my day, drinking and masturbating and forgot all about it. About 20 minutes later, my 5 year old daughter went in to take a poop and when she was finished she wailed and screeched that she had pooped out a LIVE! FISH! Well, as much as I don't like messing with little kids'ss minds, I must admit I had a bit of fun with her and told her that she was going to die.
Wait, no that wasn't it, I told her that sometimes people poop out live fish. So, does that make me a bad parent or the most BRILLIANT parent on the face of the earth?