change4adollar (change4adollar) wrote in thequestionclub,

Hey Guys!

Would this hurt your pride at all?

I have been dating Matt for almost 4 years.  I am 25, he is 23.  We function like a married couple, we just don't want to get married.  (Nothing to do with being married to each other, just married in general...we are happy the way we are).  We bought a house together, have joint accounts and such.  As involved as a married couple just w/o the paper.  So lately I just have not been feeling it and had been trying to figure things out...and I believe I may have.  Here is what I want to say

He doesn't challenge me anymore.  We went to college together.  He always excelled and his work pushed me to work harder.  He always pushed me to be a better person.  Not so much anymore.  He is never going to be powerful.  I have no doubt that he will be successful, just not powerful.  He is not that type of person.  He is too laid back.  He doesn't take charge, he takes orders.  He is just not management material.  I don't mean this to sound mean, it is just his personality.  Some people are powerful, go getters who run the show.  Some people are willing workers.  He just happens to be the latter. challenge there.  And then there is me as a person.  He loves me just fine the way I am (I know I should not be complaining about this!).  I never feel any challenge to be better, do better, do more.  It is like we are in a routine already.  We come home, have dinner, watch TV, go to bed.  Never any excitment.  I offer suggestions on things to do.  Anything.  I just need him to challenge me.  I can accept that he will never be powerful, that is his personality.  But what about the rest?

If I told him all of this, if I were to tell you this, would it crush your pride?

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