January 3rd, 2010


(no subject)

Greetings, TQC!
It's time to make some haiku!
Care to play along?

Limericks are certainly fine too,
If that is what you wish to do.
It matters not to me;
I'm only here to see
What poetry can come from you.

Music recommendations?

What kind of music do you listen to when trying to cheer yourself up? What music gets you pumped and ready to go? Get you out of a slump?

I just realized I have way too much depressing music and that I need something lighter.

What are a few of your favorite songs?
*betty draper reading

laptop privacy

You wake up one morning and find that your SO/roommate has unexpectedly brought two of his/her friends over. (You know their names but other than that you don't really know them.) You had left your laptop in the living room overnight, and one of his/her friends is now using your laptop to listen to music off the internet (but for all you know s/he might have been snooping through your email/tabs/bookmarks/history/etc. when you were asleep).

1. How violated/bothered would you feel?

2. What would you do?

(no subject)

What clock (or clocks) do you have by your bed? Do you have an alarm clock, a clock radio, a cell phone, all of the above, none of the above?

I have two clocks: one that's loud enough to wake me up, and one where the numbers are big enough that I can see them without my glasses. Should I get one clock that combines both functions?

If you were to replace your alarm clock(s), what alarm clock(s) would you get in its place?

(no subject)

Your SO wants to pour something over your nipples and then lick them off erotically. However, there's a small-ish list of things in the kitchen. What would you settle for having licked off your nips?

French vanilla coffee creamer
Potato salad
Hot coffee
Tapioca pudding
Campbells clam chowder
Apple juice
Cottage cheese
Canned tuna
Nacho cheese
Creamed corn
Whipped cream
r lee ermey

(no subject)

So I am chowing down on some wasabi covered peanuts and I have a sudden urge to touch my eyeball.
On a scale of 1 to 10 (1 being "Visine" to 10 being "FFFiiiiire!!")
how do you think that felt?
Does this help you in any way?
something up there

(no subject)

Hey TQC. I don't want to go to work today. It'll be my first day ever working this job without smoking a cigarette, and I'm worried I'm going to just flip out on some asshole customer and get written up or something. Anyone have any techniques for dealing with irritation while quitting? Normally, I just leave the room to calm down, but I can't do that while I'm on cash.
Bandit Driving

(no subject)

I've worked 50+ hours this week without a day off. I was planning on spending today relaxing and getting work (grocery shopping, house cleaning, etc) done that I couldn't during a week. One of my jobs just left me a message asking if I was planning on coming in today. I know they need help getting inventory done and I won't be able to come in Mon-Wed due to my other job.

Should I suck it up, go in and put off housework & grocery shopping until my next day off (Thursday maybe) or tell them I can't make it in today?
devon ramen

(no subject)

i brought in a stray cat last night and let her eat sleep and poop in my bathroom. i woke up four hours earlier than planned, changed her kitty litter, put food and milk in there and played with her for a while. BUT i want to sleep again tqc! she keeps mew-ing if i leave her in the bathroom though (can't leave her in my room as she scratches and ruins my stringy wallpaper and jumps on tables), and i feel so guilty and awful :( should i let her outside and bring her in tonight? or just leave her in there?

eta: she's lived around my compound for years and i've fed her for years, so i won't have any problem calling her in when i need to or anything like that.

(no subject)

Denny Crane on Boston Legal reminds me exactly of my dad. This is both an awesome (in a good way) and disturbing thing, and you'll know exactly what I mean by that if you've seen the show.

Do your parents remind you of any TV/movie characters?
Maynard pen
  • neaira

(no subject)

Hi TQC, will you help me decide what book to read next?

I am torn between the new Margaret Atwood novel or starting George R. R. Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire series.

What say you, TQC?

Do you have any other suggestions? I read pretty much anything.

Edit: I'm going with Song of Ice and Fire. Thanks, guys! :)
  • Current Music
    Jason Mraz channel on Pandora.com
  • yahvah

(no subject)

A 2005 study by the German Federal Interior Ministry (Bundesministerium des Innern) indicated that Autobahn sections with unrestricted speed have the same accident record as sections with speed limits. The only identifiable source of traffic risks in connection with speeding have been high-powered light trucks that came up within the last 15 years and as they are used by courier services (e.g. Mercedes-Benz Sprinter and trucks alike). Over the years they were only capable of speeds comparable to heavy duty trucks, but since manufacturers began to build in significantly more powerful engines they attain speeds of up to 180 km/h. This led to a significant portion of fatal accidents being caused by such vehicles [12] due to the driver overestimating their or the car's abilities to cope with sudden and heavy braking, side-winds, etc.


Do you think the accidents in the United States are caused by the same conditions as stated above?

How often do you see people exceeding the speed limit by 5-10MPH while also going with the flow of the rest of the traffic?

Are the speeding laws really about personal safety or the safety of others, or are they mostly about being a source of income?

(no subject)

Are there any human features that wouldn't normally be considered beautiful/handsome by normal standards, that you find attractive?

For instance, on girls I think gap-teeth (like Vanessa Paradis and Anna Paquin), freckles, crazy curly and/or red hair are freakin' adorable. And on guys: funky James-McAvoy-like noses, crooked smiles, sticky-out ears, and more on the skinny-side type bodies.
  • kmeghan


what movie should I see today?

I can see Paranormal activity, couples retreat or where the wild things are for free

or blind side or avatar for like 6 bucks.

I'd see any of these, but any recommendations?

ETA: Why do people need to give me shit about what I do? I asked my FB friends for any recommendations, and my aunt chimes in with "again?!" (because I'd posted something about seeing a movie last week, but didn't end up going) WTH... she's always commenting about my status.. when I thanked my parents for the new monitor my dad sent me, she asked "Didn't you just get a bike for Christmas?" yes, I did....the monitor was a free one my dad got, and he knew I didn't have a flat panel one.... blah.
  • Current Music
    Dog Days Are Over - Florence + the Machine

(no subject)

Which MMO should I start playing? (Massive Multiplayer Online)

World of Warcraft (I already have a level 71 paladin, but I got bored.)
Lord of the Rings Online (I love the movies A LOT.)
Neither, keep your cash
I have a better MMO for you, let me tell you about it.
Quinn Twin

Locking Gas Cap?

So, a couple of weeks ago, my friend Duane mentioned on his FB that he had stopped a dad from beating (like, BEATING) his 14 year old kid (while calling him a lovely euphemism for a gay man) at an all ages show. Amongst the WAY TO GO! comments was one from a girl saying he also should have tried to see which car the guy was in and broke a cigarette off from the butt and stuck it in the loser's gas tank to really get revenge.

My tank door doesn't lock and neither does my cap, so I bought a locking one and have been hemming and hawing about if it is really needed. My thought was that, while I would never do anything like what the dude who spurred this convo did, people are malicious and vandalism is a real crime - and I have no line of defense to deter it at all. But I've never actually known anyone who had their tank messed with, not even second hand. And to put it on, I'd have to do some light damage to my car since my cap is attached by a plastic chord to the door so I don't lose it. Worth it if the cap is realistically needed, obnoxious if not.

So what say you? Do you guys know of anyone who's had something actually poured/placed in their tank? Any thoughts on what you might do if you were me? I tried Googling for some real life stats, but really didn't get much (which I admit might have been due to my not really knowing how to word the search best). Thanks!

(no subject)

On a scale of 1 to 10, how happy does football Sunday make you?


Are you going to watch as many playoff games as possible?


I'm so glad you agree! Are you hoping the Steelers don't make it?


Me too! We think alike. Truly an unbiased poll wouldn't you say?


(no subject)

I am generally NOT, in any way, shape or form, a sci-fi/action movie kinda girl. Can you convince me to see Avatar?

Should I greet my SO (who I haven't seen in more than a month) in cute lingerie when he gets home today? Or is that a little too ...forward?

(no subject)

My child has been invited to a classmate's birthday party.
The mom handed me the invite and I asked at that point what the boy would like. She said, "Oh no gifts, we're just having a party to celebrate!"
It also says as much on the invite.

Do you abide and not get a gift?

I'm nervous about the whole thing.

We're making a card, but is that enough?

The party is today at the bowling alley. I kinda feel bad coming there empty-handed. Is it rude to bring a small gift anyways?

(no subject)

1.) What do you think about ROTC programs?

2.) I'm really trying to read more books this year. Recommend some? I'll read pretty much anything except I'm not too big on mystery novels. I just finished reading The Reader by Bernard Schlink and A Single Man by Christopher Isherwood, and I loved them both.
Genghis Kong

Poop poll

You're trapped in an elevator with your SO. No way out until help arrives. In this scenario, would you prefer it if you suddenly suffered a bout of uncontrollable diarhea or your SO?

I'd rather have the poops. I can better tolerate my own stank
I'd rather my SO had the poops. It's less embarrassing on my end

You're going on a road trip with your SO. You're on the freeway on an 8-lane highway, all the way over in the fast lane when gridlock happens. Every car on the road is locked and no car has moved in about 5 minutes. It's at this point that you realize that you suddenly have to poop REALLY REALLY bad. What do you do?

Open up the car door ajar, lower rump and let loose the bowels of war
Same as above except I just unroll the window instead
Do it in my pants
Leap out of the car and race to the shoulder of the road and poop behind a bush
Jump up on the middle divide and poop on the cars speeding the other way
Hop in the back seat and poo in a bag and drop it out the window
Crawl under the car where no one can see and do my business

(no subject)

For those of you who know something about jewelry, is Collapse ) Tiffany necklace a fake? A friend of mine got it for Christmas and I have my doubts. I haven't seen it in person yet, but being the nosy person I am, I went on the Tiffany site to see how much her boyfriend paid for it and couldn't find it. I think her BFs a douche so I'd love to call him out. What do you think? Sorry the picture's not the best quality. It's the only one I have!

again., Flapjack

(no subject)

You're reading a book that you randomly picked off a shelf at the library (I judge my books by their covers) and when you're reading it in public someone asks what you're reading. You're sure they've never heard of it before (so it's not Twilight, Lord of the Rings, Catcher in the Rye, Frankenstein or some other well known classic)...

How do you go about explaining it to them? Do you just tell them the title? Do you give them the name and a brief synopsis? Do you just say "a book"?
  • vaguely

(no subject)

You find a purse on the side of the road. Clearly someone has put it on top of their car and driven off. You open it and find a wallet, in which is identifying information for a house that is unfortunately quite far from your house. Inside is also a cell phone. There's money in the wallet. You, being an upstanding citizen, have no desire to take the money.


do you go through the phone beyond what is necessary to find someone who can find the owner? Do you read the text messages? Do you look at their photos?
  • Current Mood
    curious curious

Analyze this

Why do I get so unreasonably angry when a call center employee from India tells me his name is "Jim Hall?"

ETA:  They just called again.  This time it was "Michael Smith."  I was calmer, but I still failed to allow the call to proceed, because I insisted on dealing with this fake-name issue.  I pleaded with the guy on behalf of his ancestors to simply honor their generations of struggle by letting me know his real moniker.


What are you favorite games to play on the computer? 

Whether they're online or not.. I'm bored on break from school and need something to play! I'd love to try Spore but I can't find a free trial that's like that actual game (they are all 'creature creature' things). My bf wants me to try WOW but I don't think I'd enjoy it. I used to play the regular Warcraft games back in the day and liked them.

Where can I download games for free?

What are some hobbies you've succesfully kept up?
Hyde & Jacky
  • mikaa

(no subject)

I am the secretary for a club at school. It was decided that we would have a dinner at a restaurant together nearby the school. The president of the club emailed me and asked if I could drive her home after the dinner to which I said yes because she only lives 10 minutes away. Now, she emailed me again asking if I could drive the treasurer home as well and he lives about 25 minutes away from the restaurant and about 40 minutes away from my house. This would make my drive about an hour longer to get home after the dinner.

My questions are:

1) Is it fair of them to ask this of me?
2) Am I justified in being annoyed by this request?
3) How can I tell them to piss off? (Srs and nonsrs)

Another bizarre lolworthy sex question

If a midget brags about having a large penis, does this make the idea of having sex with him more appealing?

A large penis on this tiny fellow would look like a third leg. Could it be easier then to just pretend that you're not banging a midget with a big schlong, but rather riding a centaur pony missing a leg?

(no subject)

Can anyone recommend a good stand mixer?

I have a craptacular Sunbeam brand one that I bought on sale a few years ago, but ack. I hate it. I'd love to have a Kitchenaid, but even if I did have the extra cash to spend on it, I think the husband would have a hissy fit.

Also I made a cake. Should I make white butter cream or chocolate butter cream frosting to go with it?

(no subject)

this is probably stupid_free eligible, but i want to make a lemon and goat's cheese tart, but i don't have a tart/flan case. D: is there anything else i could use? we've only got a roasting tin and a cake tin. i was thinking maybe i could make tartlets?

Clem & Joely

(no subject)

Have you ever replaced the battery or the hard drive of your ipod on your own?

I've had my ipod for about 4+ish years w/o any replacements and it's constantly freezing and making clicking noises when I try to listen to it and I always have to reset it. From the research I've done, it sounds like the hard drive is getting worn out and replacing it is the fix. The DIY tutorials I've seen have made it look incredibly easy and I was just wondering if it was that easy for you if you've done it. Did it fix the problem?

Also, my battery dies really fast now and I need to replace it, too. If you've replaced the battery on your own, was that easy, too?

I'm determined to keep this ipod as long as possible. I'll feel like apple's beat me if I have to get a new one. If I don't get a zune instead. W/e.
dianna agron ;;


I'm about to drive 4 hours across the country and I'm bored of all the cds I have currently. I fancy making a mix for the trip. It's gonna be dark, crappy weather and mostly motorways so I want happy upbeat dancing songs I can bop my head to. ANY SUGGESTIONS?!
red riding hood

(no subject)

Would you consider someone poking holes in a condom with intentions to create a pregnancy without their partner knowing to be on par with rape?

Why/why not?

Does your opinion change if these actions result in a pregnancy?
Ginger Snaps

Burning questions

Why does Facebook chat suck baboon ass?

Why are all the girls I've been interested in lately in RL been so far out of my scene?

Will my Bengals beat the Jets tonight? Can fierce cats take down fighter planes?

(no subject)

The relationship and attraction questions below make me curious as to what character traits women are looking for exactly.  This is what I have gathered so far, what is missing or wrong?

Don't Be This Guy: Clingy, Creepy, Fat, Mean, Aggressive, Submissive/Weak, Ostentatious, 30

Instead, Be This Guy: Confident/Strong, Nice, Not an Asshole/Stalker, Intelligent (ETA: Funny, Respectful, Affectionate, Creative.)

Also, what kind of hair do you ladies like on your man?  I wore mine long (almost to shoulders) in high school, very short (buzzed -- kinda) in college.  I need a change!

(no subject)

Is there a movie that you love, but would change something about?
What is it & why?

I just finally watched Inglourious Basterds. I loved it but honestly if I had my way it'd be 164 minutes of Basterds only. And a certain sexy ass character wouldn't fucking die half way through the movie!!!
MLP - pinkie chicken

(no subject)

This poll assumes that there is no grey area or "I don't know, I don't have a preference".

Which of these are true for you? (there is no "I am indifferent" - pick one).

I prefer for my SO to be taller than me
I prefer for my SO to be shorter than me
I prefer for my SO to be skinnier than me
I prefer for my SO to be my size
I prefer for my SO to be larger than me
I prefer dark (black or brown) hair
I prefer light (red or blonde) hair
I prefer grey hair, or baldness
I would rather my SO have dogs than cats
I would rather my SO have cats than dogs


I would rather my SO be nerdy/geeky than athletic (eg: spends more time gaming/with computers than outside)
I would rather my SO be athletic than nerdy/geeky (eg: spends more time outside than gaming/with computers)
I would rather my SO have dark (brown or hazel) eyes
I would rather my SO have light (blue or green) eyes
I would rather my SO dress up than down (eg: nice shirts and khakis over jeans and a t-shirt) on an average day
I would rather my SO dress down than up (eg: jeans and a t-shirt over nice shirts and khakis) on an average day
I would prefer that my SO enjoy giving and receiving oral sex
I would prefer that my SO not really be fan of giving or receiving oral sex
It is more important to me that my SO like the same music as me rather than movies
It is more important to me that my SO like the same movies as me rather than music


My ideal SO prefers to be the one to do the driving
My ideal SO prefers that I be the one to do the driving
I would prefer that my SO is open to one day having children
I would prefer a childfree SO
dianna agron ;;

(no subject)

When people ask where you live, what do you usually say? Country, state, province, county, planet?

Just intrigued by people who say "UK" instead of "England" or "Alabama" instead of "USA"
Obviously depends who you're talking to, just mean generally.


(no subject)

My smoke alarm/carbon monoxide detector just started shrieking like a banshee about 10 minutes ago. I ripped it out of the ceiling and it says:

Three long beeps followed by Fire!Fire! - there's fire
Four short beeps followed by WARNING CARBON MONOXIDE - there's CO
One chirp every 60 seconds - low battery

Nothing about one, prolonged, ear splitting shriek. Am I about to die?

(no subject)

Have you seen that Life After People show?
Does it freak you out?
How come they left out all the human carnage?

Got anything important to do tomorrow?

What are your plans for the next decade?

(no subject)

TQC, my brother and step-brother are hogging the front room, they're playing on their laptops and watching boring football on the TV. Would it be childish of me to go down and insist they change the channel, even though there's nothing I *particularly* want to watch?
The fact that they're playing on laptops shows they're not really interested in the telly, right?
  • 0livia

(no subject)

If this email exchange was all you could read from a novel, what would you imagine the rest of the story is here between the two characters?

Scott's email:

"Hi. Happy New Year etc. Sorry I've been MIA lately but I finally get a day off tomorrow, soon enough to celebrate an arbitrary passing of time! Whatever you're doing hope you have fun. Drunk Melissa. Think about it. ;)"

Melissa's reply:

"Hey, yeah, Happy New Year to ya too. Hope you had a good Christmas and all that.
Was fun hipster hunting with you, and good to know you're not a Napster bot after all, lol.
p.s. If you write any more Skytrain haikus, you know where to send 'em. :P"

Edit (7:25 p.m.):
Collapse )

(no subject)

Poll #1506881 Sweet Potato Pie or Pumpkin Pie

Have you ever eaten sweet potato pie?


Did you enjoy it?


Have you ever eaten pumpkin pie?


Did you enjoy it?


What area of the US are you from?

Other US territories

If you are not from the US, what area of the world are you from?

Central America
South America
Australia/New Zealand/Pacific Islands
I'm not from this planet

Do you identify as male, female, or neither? (optional)


Do you prefer pumpkin pie or sweet potato pie?

I'm just going to use this space to declare my love for sweet potato pie. If you haven't tried it, find someone to make it for you, preferably from the South, if possible.

Canda is supposed to be Canada. Unfortunately, I can't edit the poll.

(no subject)

Ok seriously.
I live in a house that has 2 apartments, one on the first floor, one on the second floor.
I live on the second floor, and EVERY DAY I can hear my neighbors down there running around (they're kids), being loud as shit for long periods of time.

Is it NORMAL for a 2nd floor to be able to hear stomping-noise from the 1st floor?????

Will you please share some neighbor horror stories so I will stop being so pissed off?

(no subject)

my neighbor makes bacon a LOT, I'm thinking 4-6 times a week at least. I'm tempted to tell him that's bad for his health.

What do your neighbors make a lot of?

Is there anything you make often than smells intense enough that your neighbors know?

health insurance?

what company provides your health insurance? are you happy with it? is it expensive? what are some good things/bad things about that company?

i've had kaiser permanente for a few years and i'm definitely due for an upgrade. i hate them. they're cheap but you get what you pay for apparently. i'm looking for ideas on who i might switch to.
anontang DA

(no subject)

TQC, I'm considering waxing my legs, as I'm sick and tired of shaving and having prickly hairs the next day. If you wax, what do you recommend using for a first timer? Also, do you have any tips to keep this process as painless as possible?

(no subject)

Is anybody here really good at separating pictures of people from their backgrounds?

I'm trying to cut out a picture of Robert Pattinson (I know, I know) from a gray background and make the background transparent, so I can print it on one of those iron transfer sheets to make a friend's birthday present. But I fail at cutting out all the little details around his freakishly wild hair.

If you know how to do this, will you help me?
It's this picture if you were wondering.

(no subject)

probably a dumb question but....

i went to mtv.com and mtvU.com to see if i could watch the woodie awards and it has a link that says 2009 woodie awards:WATCH THE WHOLE THING ON DEMAND so i clicked that and it was just a clip. SOOOOOO does anyone know where i can actually watch the entire award show online? a link maybe or why the hell it wont work for me when i go there?

if not. show me the background of your cellphone? or what kind of cell phone do you have?
Soul Doll Blue Eyes

Picture Post

Only with a slight twist

Will you post a picture of what you think other people should look like based on their response to the next statement?

Describe yourself and the things you like do do in a few words.
lost in translation

(no subject)

Will people think I am a celebrity if I wear my sunglasses in the airport?

[Edit @ 11:56 P.M.]
To the Negative Nancies:
I hate you all. You are all party poopers.
I probably won't wear my sunglasses in the airport. Wearing sunglasses annoys me anyways and it sounds like the airports are being extra cautious with security measures recently. There's no need to waste people's time with unnecessary worry and extra thorough baggage checks.

(no subject)

I'm a seventeen year old high school graduate with a few extra hours during the day. I don't drive, like doing artsy things, and am good at talking to people.

How can I make some extra money?
srs and non srs welcome.

*EDIT: I already have a job, but it's steady hours (3-6, aftercare program) and need something to do in the morning :)
Coffee cups

(no subject)

 Why have I had a headache since Thursday? It's not even a NYE hangover hangover, I only had one drink...

What's your favorite card game? (Either digitally or for real)
I enjoy BS and gin rummy in person, and rummy, blackjack, and poker on my DS.

(no subject)

I have this totally awesome book from WWI. It's filled with original artwork (poetry, watercolours, ink drawings) by local artists of that time. I want to learn more about it. My questions are: where would I go to find out more about it? Have you seen something similar (and if so, could you tell me about it)? What's a good way to preserve it? Right now it's hanging out in an unused drawer.

I tried to find the artists but I've had no luck thus far. :/
  • Current Mood
    curious curious
Xhinese friends after lunch in Guanghzou


There are two types of riches in the world.You can have one, or the other.
One is material riches, you know lots of money, big fancy house ,lots of designer clothes
The other is the riches of the heart.
Which one would you choose ?
  • Current Mood
    curious curious
warhol zebra

(no subject)

What is the most recent food item you created that just made you go "WOW THAT IS AWESOME"?
I made hard-boiled eggs and instead of eating them with salt and pepper, I cut them in half, scooped half the yolk out, and replaced it with a green olive. OMG SO YUM

What should I make for my parents for breakfast tomorrow morning? I have access to eggs, bacon, bread, ham, some fresh vegetables, cheese, potatoes, lots of canned fruit, fresh oranges, and all the fixings for pancakes.
I'm thinking potato pancakes maybe, but I don't know. They are not picky in the least.

(no subject)

In your experience, what is the best bank? By "best" I mean most trustworthy/least likely to fuck you over.
I'm wondering because I just realized that PNC is evil and sadistic so I will be changing banks tomorrow. I'm in the Philly area soo Philly/national banks would be appreciated (:

(no subject)

I go back to uni in 2 weeks. How can I make the most of being at home?
How can I also make it easier to go back? I'm irrationally scared of being lonely, as I was for a bit last term.
[Mando] Din Djarin

(no subject)

Do you ever get that really gross smell on your clean clothes when you put them in the closet for a while? My friend and I call it the "closet smell", and it seems to get on our clothes pretty easily. We think it might be the fabric, what do you think TQC?
cursed wolf
  • kcroft

Vixy alternative?

Can anyone recommend another site for ripping YouTube videos and sound? I was using vixy.net, but as of late, the files won't convert properly.

What YT capture sites seem to work best for you?

(no subject)

My hands are cracking and bleeding, TQC. D:
It happens every year during the winter. Lotion doesn't help at all.

Besides going to see a dermatologist or something like that, is there anything I can do?

If you don't know, maybe post a picture of the creepiest thing you can find?

(no subject)

Can you tell me your stories about being friends-who-like-each-other-but-never-tell?
(I'm giving up on hyphens now)
Can you tell me your stories on friends who like each other but never tell but got together in the end?
Do you believe these circumstances work out?

(no subject)

What is the quote "Yes, yes! A thousand times yes!" from?

(side note: I know a girl who said that in response to her boyfriend proposing marriage. I just couldn't think of where it is from.)

(no subject)

I am very depressed and suicidal. I am getting bad urges to overdose and cut. Will you please tell me anything to make me feel better? Any advice, funny videos/gifs, things to do, PLEASE?

(no subject)

What's a good way to have extra energy during the day after not getting a lot of sleep? It looks like it'll be an all-nighter for me tonight. :/
And this excludes caffeine-related tricks...I am immune. :[