||[Sep. 28th, 2009|05:53 pm]
The Question Club
TQC, I'm in a dilemma. |
I'm a 19yr old sophomore living at a university. I've been so sheltered my whole life that I feel like once I get out into the "real world" I'm gonna just puke everywhere because I have no idea what's going on. I'm not paying for anything - cell phone, car, laptop, school, etc. are all covered by my parents. However, I WANT to help out. I feel like I'm getting to the age when I need to take on responsibilities and actually take charge of my own life.
My dad wants to control me and aggressive is an understatement. I'm an only child and therefore all of my actions must pass through him for "approval." More often than not, he will hear a request of mine (having my car on campus, living off campus next year, etc) and say no right off the bat without taking in any of my very reasonable points and objectives. Once he says no, it's no. There is no reasoning with him, his word is law because "he's the head of the house."
I've been applying for on-campus jobs for weeks now and have come to the conclusion that there just aren't any - no surprise. Last night I applied to a few places off-campus and by 9:30 this morning I had a call from a coffee shop that I had previously worked at in two other locations. Amazing, right? An interview less than 12 hours later. I call my mom telling her news, she says it's fantastic, yada yada.
A half hour later I get a text form my dad saying, "no coffee shop on Ford Rd, only on-campus." I replied, "there are NO JOBS on campus," to which he hasn't replied. OKAY, WTF TQC. I'm trying to be responsible by getting a job (which he hounded me about) and once I got it he just denies me. I know his reasoning is that it's going to be it's too far (15 min), it's too close to my boyfriend, you're going to be distracted from studying. I have to continually tell him that I'm responsible, I don't smoke, drink, have sex, whatever. I got a 4.0 last semester and I'm pretty sure that I can't do much better than that.
My boyfriend and good friends tell me to just go to the interview, nail it, and get the job. I'm leaning towards that. However, if he finds out (which he will) he could take away my car, phone, laptop, things along those lines. I've never disobeyed him and have no idea what the repercussions could be and finding out scares me. :( I don't know what to do.
tl;dr - what responsibilities or privileges did you have at 18-20? Do you think they were accurate to your age group?