||[Nov. 1st, 2008|10:21 pm]
The Question Club
TQC, one of the upstairs bathtubs clogged up, my basement has a huge leak, the kitchen sink's pipe burst (and I mean BURST, and I JUST washed the fucking floor) and now, my septic system just overflew and flooded the backyard. Oh, and my backyard flood lights are suddenly broken, so I have to help my husband navigate with flashlights.|
Is this all part of my husband's drastic plan to avoid having to help me clean the bedroom?
Also, my husband's lazy-ass aunt is here with us for the weekend because his parents, who she normally lives with, are out of town, and she's afraid to be in the house by herself. She has since smoked in one of the upstairs bathrooms and my INFANT SON'S BEDROOM (because she was afraid to smoke outside while we were out to dinner on our enclosed back porch. What?), ramsacked my son's room for what reason I know not and left it a mess, followed me around the damn house like a lost puppy dog constantly asking me stupid questions (why do you have DirectTV instead of Comcast? Why do you have two car seats? Why do you keep the syrup in the cabinet? And my personal favorite, did you know the Phillies won the World Series? No, Jean, I am deaf and blind and was in a sound-proofed bubble while I sat in the rain in game 5 THAT YOU WERE ALSO AT WITH US.) The baby was screaming because he woke up and we were out back, and he was upstairs. His aunt was directly across the hall in the spare bedroom, and didn't get up to pick up the baby even though she knew we were downstairs and out back. And this is after she just ripped apart my kitchen because she couldn't "figure out why there was a wet drawer" in the kitchen. And then left my kitchen in complete shambles after I just cleaned the entire fucking thing top to bottom. My husband just came upstairs asking why it looks like a tornado went through the kitchen.
Should I kicked his fucking lazy aunt out of my house and make her sleep in the backyard?
Was I wrong for storming into the spare bedroom and yelling DID YOU NOT HEAR THE BABY SCREAMING FOR FIVE MINUTES ARE YOU THAT LAZY THAT YOU CAN'T EVEN FUCKING PICK HIM UP OR AT LEAST YELL OUT THE BACK WINDOW TO TELL ME HE'S CRYING?
Why does my birthday weekend suck balls?
Could you please give me your extra Valium?
Is this like the longest question on TQC ever?