|A day at the mall
||[Aug. 3rd, 2008|05:56 pm]
The Question Club
You're at the mall. It's the after-Thanksgiving Day sale and the place is packed. You had greasy Mexican food for lunch, and your friend bought you an iced mocha, and suddenly, you have to poop REALLY REALLY bad. You manage to get into the bathroom, and there's only 1 stall available, and for some reason, the door to that stall is missing. The other stall is out of order. The working toilet is nearest to the door, so if you poo majestically here, anyone walking into the bathroom will see you in your pants-around-ankles glory. However, there is another bathroom downstairs. You're not sure if you can hold it in that long though. It is a crowded day and people are coming in and out of the bathroom readily. What do you do?
Stay and poop. If you gotta go you gotta go. My dignity will have to take one for the team (team me)
Run downstairs and hope I make it
Crap in the out-of-order toilet, that still has a door. Let the janitor deal with the mess I make
While you're at the mall, let's say there's stairs. 20 steps total. As you're at the top of the stairs, you lose your footing and fall head over heels, topsy-turvy. Your flailing fall bumps into a fat man, and he in turn bumps into an old lady, and she bumps into someone else, and before anyone knows it, 20 people are now falling down the stairs. When the emergency crew arrives, it's reported that 3 people died in the group stumble. Everybody points their finger at you. The question is, if you accidentally hit someone with your car, you can be tried with manslaughter, but if you accidentally knock someone to their death down some stairs, can you also be tried with manslaughter? What do you feel?
What a rough day! You're then in line at JC Pennys, and right in front of you in line is Ann Coulter, buying a pack of white socks and men's boxers. Under her arm is a book that's titled WHY LIBERALS ARE GAY AND HATE AMERICA. She gets to the counter and pays for her purchases with a credit card. Close to the end of the transaction, she gets a phone call, and takes her call and package and walks away. You get to the counter, and as the salesgirl is ringing you up, you notice that Ann has left her credit card on the counter. You look around. No one else has noticed it except you. What do you do?
Shopping spree, courtesy of Ms. Coulter
I run after her to return her card
I give it to the salesgirl, and let her deal with it
I take the card and pocket it. I don't use it, and maybe even destroy it. The satisfaction will be knowing that Coulter has to get it replaced and will no doubt be doing a lot of worrying
I leave it there. Let someone else deal with the moral repercussions
Using the card, I make a $10,000 donation to the Obama Election Fund
I take it and try and contact her somehow and get a reward out of it