|on motherhood and why women choose it
||[May. 13th, 2007|04:37 pm]
The Question Club
Lately I've been thinking a lot about the idea of having children. I'm 25 now (and married) but still feel like I'm a long way from being ready to have them. I feel sort of like my maternal instincts probably should have kicked in by now. I have lots of friends with kids, but being around them hasn't make me feel any particular desire to have my own. In so many ways it seems like a large part of your life ends when you have kids. I've heard this from many mothers, but they always say that it becomes worth it. |
It makes me think about how I'm not getting any younger. I don't want to be having my first kid when I'm 35+, ya know? Something keeps telling me that now (or soon, at least) is the time, despite the fact that the whole idea terrifies me.
So I've been running through all the reasons I might want to have children in the next few years, and none of them really strike me as GOOD reasons to do it. Because I'm getting older, because my parents really want a grandkid, because I'm afraid I'll regret it later if I don't, because I feel that it's my biological imperative (okay, I don't really believe that one), because I want to know that I'm strong enough to do it, because it would give a concrete sense of purpose and meaning to my life.
Of course, something in me might click at some point and I'll just "get" it. But what if it's too late by then?
Long intro to a question, I know, but- this one's for mothers, or women who are trying to conceive. Why did you decide to have children? What were your reasons? Was it a difficult choice or an easy one?
ETA: Thanks for all your kind and thoughtful answers.