I've got a few problems here...I'm a twenty-two year-old college student and I'm in my fourth year. Yet I'll be graduating one to two years late for failing classes. My problem is that I just can't get into school anymore. I switched majors (psychology for a couple of years before going into English Lit.) I thought I wanted to major in EngLit, but I feel as if I'm changing my mind. I no longer have the desire to write essays or creative writngs or read books. I hardly pay attention in classes, because I see no point. I feel as if I'm wasting my time with frivolities like asian philosophy and humanities. And i'm only in them b/c the curriculum for Liberal Arts majors requires it. But I fail to see how these classes are helping me learn. I only feel pressure to read and be able to pass the tests. But I can't get into the readings. I'll read for a bit and the books put me to sleep literally!
I'm also in grave danger of failing humanities. I already had to take part one twice, and now it looks like I'll have to take part two twice. On average, I fail one course per year since I can't get focused or interested.
Also, I have no friends at school. My only high school pal moved to a cooking school in Nevada. But I feel as if I can't talk to or connect to anyone. Everyone's so different. I'm into certain hobbies and interests while everyone is into other things. There's also a big language/cultural barrier. Nearly everyone comes from a background where another language is spoken. I'm just a typical English-speaking American. when others try to talk to me in their native tongues, I'm pretty silent. (I constantly get mistaken for being Mexican or east Indian since I have brown hair and eyes and a slightly tan complexion). Yet I feel guilty for not knowing Spanish, etc.
So my question is: what's wrong with me? I know I'm not an idiot, but I keep falling behind from lack of interest in school. And I hate to drop out since I'm getting a grant from the state. But I feel like I'm wasting my time at school. And I can't take time off or the state will take my grant away from me. Somedays I don't even feel like living. I just feel like an empty void taking up space in a classroom and living with my parents. I feel like I'm going nowhere.
Googling for my name (with double quotes around it) brings up my LJ as the first link, without any text underneath like you usually get showing you what text matched your search words. Google seems to KNOW that LJ is mine.
Anyone know what's going on?
Does anybody remember the old show "Life Goes On"? I was just thinking about it for the first time in years and I remembered a question I ALWAYS wondered about it.
The oldest daughter (I believe her name is Paige) has a boyfriend who is HIV-positive. They want to have sex but everybody freaks out because she'll contract HIV too. She says she doesn't care because she loves him, so they do and I don't know if she gets the virus or not (although she probably would have).
What I don't understand is, why did they need to have unprotected sex? Couldn't they have used a condom and prevented the spread of disease? Or am I wrong in believing that condoms protect against HIV?
On that same note... if you love somebody that you know for a fact is HIV-positive or potentially even full-blown AIDS... perhaps they develop the disease after you are married. Would you continue to sleep with them (or start, if you never have before), or would you forego pleasure for safety?
Does anyone know how to convert a TomeRaider (.tr or .tr3) file to a straight .TXT file?
What does conditioner do for your hair anyways? The ends of my hair always feel nice and soft right after I condition it, but a day later they feel like straw. Could it possibly be the conditioner thats making it feel this way?
Have you read any of Wally Lamb's books (such as She's Come Undone or I Know This Much is True?) What did you think of them?
I can't decide either way whether Terry Schiavo should die considering her circumstances. What I have left are specific questions, which, I think, may remain unanswered:
1. Are there any other methods of asking a yes-or-no question and acquiring an answer other than audibly and has anyone thought to use such to ask Terry if she still wants to die?
2. Is there no more humane way to let someone die other than starvation?
Until these two questions are answered beyond doubt, I cannot say that Terry should die simply because she is unable to feed herself.
3. What is the nature of the nation that mandates death for those who are consciously awake, aware of their surroundings, and having a body that does not need life support, but cannot feed themselves?
why do people feel they need to apologize if they make more than one post a day..?
I work for a non-profit org. that uses its proceedes to help retarded adults find real paying jobs (as opposed to supervised "work environments" you know) and we're not supposed to say "retarded". We say developmentally disabled instead.
Why is there a stigma around the word "retarded"? I think it's quite an accurate term, and certainly not degrading, as opposed to "vegetable", for instance.
Oh, and, how many books do you currently have checked out from your library? (Me, fifteen, I think.)
Do you have any preferences that just don't Edit: standardly, usually, to everyone else seem logical?
Such as, my aunt goes into Spencers with no problem, but will not go into hot topic.
I can't stand cigarettes... but have no problem with marijuana.
I feel fairly uncomfortable with porn, but less uncomfortable with hentai(maybe because it's animated, even if it's much more graphic).
How tight/loose is a condom supposed to be?
Does anybody know a sort of "take the plank from your eye before taking the spinter from someone else's" kindof quote for... well... There's this girl in my house who seems to be much still in the high-school "label everybody, change to fit in, have boyfriend for the sex, if you're cool than you're always right" sortof mentality. She's taken to putting quotes on her door like "Life's too short to be a selfish biatch[sic]. Lol. Don't be FAKE!" ... which would be a little bit like Jessica and Ashlee singing about brains and poise. I don't think she'd get that the quote was towards her, but the rest of the house would find it hysterical.
Other Edit: What's the time you're supposed to abstain from sex and such before a gyno appt? what happens if you don't?
1. What did you do after high school? (School, work, travel, etc.) More specifically, what did you do from ages 18-24?
2. How old were you when you first moved into your own place?
Who did you live with, if anyone?
How much was rent? (sorry for the nosy-ness.. just curious but answer is optional)
3. Describe what living with your parents is/was like.
4. What is the hardest part about being on your own?
5. At what age did you become financially independent?
6. Any other comments on the wonderful world of adulthood?
1. Quiet songs that you like to fall alseep to or if you are awake, they put you to sleep?
2. Middle names: Do you care about them? Do they serve a purpose? How much effort will you go through in giving your kid a middle name?
Have you ever snorted anything that wasn't a drug just for the heck of it?
(Chai powder, hot chocolate mix, crushed smarties, etc.)
1. does the removal of a benign cyst count as plastic surgery?
2. is being a doctor really THAT prestigious/secure?
What kinds of things do you dream about when you are asleep and need to pee?
a) do yoga (ommm.....)
b) watch TV (anyone going to check out Grey's Anatomy tonight?)
c) read books on music industry (did you know that audio tape was a Nazi invention brought to the US after WWII?)
d) read "Peace Like a River" for English (anyone read it? is it good?)
e) work on learning scores to a musical ("bloody mary is the girl I love!")
f) practice some pieces for work tomorrow ("let this be our prayer...")
g) work through some more blues piano theory (cue funky blues riff)
or f) pull out my Beatles greatest hits book and have fun? ("she was a daaaaay tripper...")
What DSL/Cable service providers (aside from SBC Yahoo) are good and reasonably priced? If it helps, I life in San Francisco. Is there one main site dedicated to this sort of stuff, with price and service rates?
Who watched Jesus Christ Superstar today?!!!
I AM WATCHING IT NOW, I wait all year for this event, I will eventually have to buy it. I am not religious in ANY aspect of my life, but this story really is great and the singers are amazing and I get perma-goosebumps watching this.
Who's your favorite singer in this movie/play/musical? Mine is a tie between Judas Iscariot and Caiaphus.
What purpose do fingernails serve?
What is your dream?
You know, what/who do you want to be? What do you want to have? What do you want to experience? What do you want to do? That sort of thing.
What's a magnetar? As in the song rape me by Nirvana... I am drawn to your magnetar.. What is he talking about?
Is/have anyone here (under the age of 21) worked full-time?
What else were you doing at the time?
EDIT: If you are still living at home, and have a job, what does your family make you pay for? Do you owe them rent?
What do you say to people when they ask you why you're working already now, when you have 40+ more years of working ahead of you?
Could you please give me hair tips?
I have very wavy and frizzy hair. Generally, I wear it long. More length makes the hair heavier, which means less poofiness. With summer coming up, and also for the interest of my boyfriend, I cut it shoulder-length. (Nearly 7 inches, chop!)
My boyfriend says it looks great, but if it had more body and was straighter, it'd look even better.
Being a tomboy, I have no idea what body is, much less how to add it to my hair. I've tried various shampoos. They work great for about a week and then have no effect.
Also, I have tried straightening my hair, but the chemicals only last for about a month before the waves return. The best thing I have found is to flat-iron my hair, but that takes forever and I have to do it every single day.
Is there anything else I do to add body to my hair and straighten it out?