How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
One
6(14.6%)
3.14 cubit feet
3(7.3%)
All of it
23(56.1%)
2 acres
5(12.2%)
5 gallons of wood
4(9.8%)
All the king's horses, and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty back together again. Why do you suppose that was?
The king's men were interns at best. Not a lot of working medical background experience
7(16.7%)
The horses' clear lack of opposable thumbs
8(19.0%)
Humpty Dumpty's injuries were not covered by his health insurance
10(23.8%)
They ran out of duct tape and egg glue
7(16.7%)
You let giant mammals with hooves close to the injured person. What do you expect was going to happen? A miracle?
10(23.8%)
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What would you have to do to get the most of the apple's doctor-wardiing ability?
Eat it. It's got the vitamins and roughage you need
16(39.0%)
Throw it at the doctor as hard as you can. He'll stay away
20(48.8%)
Shove it up his bum. Once sated, he'll stop following you
5(12.2%)
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him ______?
Drink
7(16.7%)
Walk on the water like Jesus
7(16.7%)
Love you. No one loves you
9(21.4%)
Forget about Humpty Dumpty. It still haunts him that he couldn't save that guy
17(40.5%)
Your wife. Homo-bestial relations are frowned upon in your area
2(4.8%)
She sells seashells by the seashore. How sound of a business plan is this?
Lousy. One could find their own seashells for free rather than pay her outrageous marked up prices
26(61.9%)
Brilliant. That's mainly why I go to the seashore, but find it time consuming hunting for seashells
6(14.3%)
I believe that this is a euphamism for prostitution, which is illegal. Stop selling your 'seashell' to the sailors and get a real job
10(23.8%)