How many poops do you average in a day? In a week?
How long does it take you to do the deed? Are you a Power Pooper, or do you take your time?
How do you entertain yourself while on the pot? Reading, internet surfing, rearranging the bottles on your vanity? Or do you prefer to concentrate?
What prevents you from pooing (foods, drinks, etc)? What gets things going for you?
Do you have any pooping habits that you feel are different? (Do you wipe with both hands, do you sing, etc...)
Obligatory non-scatalogical question: What is the weather forecast this weekend where you are?