what misery loves (virile) wrote in thequestionclub,
what misery loves

So, I live with my parents and our house is basically like something you'd see on Hoarders minus the mouse droppings and dead cats. I was able to clean my room without issue, but anytime I try to clean another part of the house or suggest some rules for keeping a part of the house clean (like the sink), my mom becomes decidedly unpleasant. She thinks the house needs to be cleaned 'right' and no one else but her can do it, but she feels too overwhelmed to do anything, so nothing gets done. She keeps buying things without getting rid of anything (ironically enough, she bought a vacuum which she has yet to take out of the box and has been standing in the middle of our living room like a monolith for about a week). The house has been getting worse for about four years and is depressing everyone.

Which of the following do I do?:

a) ELIMINATE CLUTTER WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE and accept that my mom will hate me for awhile, but the house will be clean. (A seriously daunting task that would probably end in failure.)
b) Become her mom, alternating between encouraging her and scolding her, until she starts helping me clean.
c) Continue cleaning the parts of the house I seem to be allowed to clean until I move out in a year, afterwards my parents can just collapse in their own misery and filth.
d) Something else which you, organizing/mental health experts of TQC, will suggest.
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